A Day Late and A Dollar Short

Written by Jen Wednesday, 25 February 2009 03:40

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I had lunch with my 94-year old grandmother last week. She apologized for being late with my son’s birthday card. “Oh, you know me,” she laughed. “I’m always a day late and a dollar short.”

First off, she wasn’t late. We have two family birthdays in one week and Grandma hit each one right on time. (She also sent valentines to each grandchild and great-grandchild.) Second, she is 94! I mean, if she wants to miss a meeting with the Pope she has the right and privilege.  Heck, she can really do whatever she wants. She rarely misses lunch with her granddaughters, though. We range in age from 18 to 42. I’m, well, not the youngest and it’s painfully obvious.

As I get older, “senior status” is looking more attractive, though. More than once I’ve longingly looked at the YMCA’s senior facilities and thought… . “ah, someday.” But what I’m really anticipating is being excused for my mathematical, uh, shortcomings. Ditto my inability to decorate or get dressed without consulting my stylish sister-in-law. Is it too early to blame missing the PTO meeting on age-related confusion?

My husband is already getting mail from AARP, thanks to the good friend who thought putting him on the mailing list was funny. (By the way, we know who you are.) He has some time before he qualifies for the early bird special at Big Boy but he is already being told that his graying hair looks distinguished. I’m waiting to be called distinguished but something tells me I’ll never hear that word, no matter how many years I mark off on the calendar of life.

Women are more likely to be characterized as classy, or "aging gracefully." My grandmother is certainly classy. She wears red lipstick and a smile as she listens to our stories about everything from jobs to term papers to teenagers. I’m certain she doesn’t catch every word, but she looks engaged, uttering the occasional “Oh, is that right?” or asking “Really?” with a genuinely concerned expression.

When we’re through chatting and nibbling, Grandma insists on paying the bill despite our protests. We always lose this fight, mostly out of respect for the woman who really is never a day late or a dollar short.